It must have been about 2 in the morning or so when his roommate came in with his girlfriend.

This happened to a friend of mine, but I thought I'd relate it here...

My friend is a lacrosse player, and takes it pretty seriously, so during the season, before big games, he makes a point to take it easy and get a good night's sleep. This was freshman year, when bunkbeds were the common sleeping arrangement, and my friend had the top bunk. It must have been about 2 in the morning or so when his roommate came in with his girlfriend.

My friend was alseep, lights were off; it was clear, however, that neither the roommate nor his girlfriend noticed the room was already occupied since they started loudly having sex on the bottom bunk. This, of course, woke my friend up. A little while passed, my friend quietly listening to the events from his upper bunk, when the roommate starts coaxing his girlfriend into having anal sex with him. She keeps saying she's not into it, and he keeps insisting - "It'll be fun," "Try something new" blah, blah, blah.

Eventually she gives in and they start going at it - my friend is of course beginning to giggle, but manages to keep the volume down so as not to be detected. The ass-screwing from the bottom bunk had barely commenced when the girlfriend lets out a loud fart and shits all over her boyfriend. So disgusted at the scene, he proceeded to vomit profusely all over her backside.

My friend completely lost it at that point and burst out laughing, erupting into such convulsions that he fell from the top bunk, landed on the floor next to his naked, feces and vomit covered companions, and broke his arm in two places.

He was out of commission for the rest of season. Go figure.