They just left me passed out in the backyard!

I was at a college mixer with a popular frat and the cheerleading squad. After drinking about 14 or 15 Keystone premiums, I wasn’t thinking too straight and I decided to try and do cheers with the cheerleaders who were also plastered.

It was fun at first, until we decided to take the fun out back. That’s when I blacked out. The next thing I remember was waking up face down in the wet grass. My friends told me the next day what happened.

Apparently, I had been trying to do flips (like the cheer girls). I flipped off the picnic table and landed straight on my head. I wasn’t hurt, but everyone was scared to touch me for fear I might have really messed up my neck. Did they call an ambulance?

No – they simply took the party back inside and checked on me periodically. After I got up, the party was still going on. It was about 3 in the morning and someone decided I would be better off if I took 3 shots and a beer bong. So I did.

Unfortunately, then I could no longer walk. Eventually, I was carried home by some girl (I still don’t know her name). Then, I woke up on my floor about 5 hours late for my 11:00 class.

Slippery Rock is the best party school in the nation. And we got good classes too, if you ever make it to them!