We met on Facebook before freshman year and I bet her we'd hook up within the first week

About two weeks before the start of my freshman year, a girl who would be living across the hall from my dorm room contacted me on Facebook. We continued to talk on occasion over the next two weeks on instant messenger and in about our third conversation I half jokingly bet her that I would be in her pants by the end of the first week. She dismissed it with a laugh saying, “I can guarantee you that’s not going to happen.” Taking this as a personal challenge I was determined to prove her wrong.

Fast-forward to the first days of my college experience, before classes had started, a period to be used by freshmen to familiarize themselves with their new surroundings. Thinking I was hot shit, I skipped out on all orientation activities and commenced to initiate myself to the college lifestyle by drinking heavily at every opportunity. The second night of partying came to a close and I stumbled my way back across campus to the freshmen dorms. Not quite ready to call it a night, I decided to make a stop across the hall to see how my new friend was doing.

After roughly a half hour of my drunken attempts to charm a sober girl, fully expecting a rejection, I decided to make my move, and to my drunken surprise she went with it. After making out for several minutes, I could no longer handle myself and I was forced to excuse myself to use the “facilities.” (Note that these dorms are suite-style, the rooms being connected through a shared bathroom.) After taking care of my business I went to walk back into her room to continue the festivities. However, when I reached the bedroom, I found the lights off and a girl in the bed. Not understanding what exactly was happening, I apparently decided to take off my clothes and proceed to caress the sleeping girl in order to complete my challenge. After a minute or so of petting and whispering sweet nothings, the sleeping girl arose and exclaimed, “WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU IN MY ROOM?”

Somehow through my drunken stupor it immediately clicked that after using the bathroom I had wandered into the wrong room and was attempting to get intimate with a girl with whom I had never even spoken, save mere formalities. Well after running back into the other room, I commenced to “lay the lumber” to Facebook girl, successfully winning the bet and validating my existence up to that point. Upon waking up and dismissing myself to my own room, I checked my computer to find messages from suite-mate girl notifying me that I could get my clothes out of her room if I needed them. Since the incident, I have had little to no contact with suite-mate girl, and have progressed to have a highly volatile relationship with Facebook girl, due partially to her inability to come to grips with my amazing game spitting abilities that caused her to lose the bet, and partially due to the thrills I get from having fun at her expense.