It was going great until Fred opened his mouth

Well it was my freshman year, and Friday night was dead as hell at our fine school. So about 20 of my closest friends and I decided we'd go over to Emory--which is about ten minutes north of Tech's downtown Atlanta campus. Emory is notorious for being full of rich girls that just suck at being humans. After I put down eight or nine beers, I knew it was time to rally the troops and move out.

Upon finding a fraternity party that was kickin, my friend Fred and I proceeded to get severely intoxicated with nothing but an empty fifth of Beam to show for our efforts. Having taken care of the buzz for the time being, I chilled with a beer and began the search for a female companion.

I found one that was mid-range at best but, in my state of mind, I really didn't care. We started the small talk for a while, and eventually she asked me if I went to school there. In some deep recesses of my mind, I reasoned that saying I went to Emory would help my chances to perhaps be hittin' the skins later--don't ask me why.

Well, she wasn't satisfied yet and more questions followed. She asked me how many hours I was taking. I figured as long as I was lying I might as well make myself appear very intelligent. "Nineteen hours," I replied. She gave me a strange look and asked what classes.

Aw, shit!

"Um…"

I managed to mumble something about psych, and she asked if I had her Professor, "Smith" or something. I said yes I did, and bitched about how he taught. She seemed to agree wholeheartedly with my story about the professor, and I was pretty pleased with how things were going.

When she asked me what dorm I lived in, I said that I lived in an apartment complex with my older brother, who was a senior. Not knowing the names of any of the dorms at Emory, I figured that was my best bet. And I was once again extremely pleased with myself for the rampant lies I was able to successfully deliver under pressure.

So she asked which ones, I just crossed my fingers and said "Woodruff," which was the name of some guy on a plaque that I saw while walking across the campus to the party. She stated that she knew where those were, and asked how the party scene was there. I told her it was great, and how much I enjoyed living there. She said it sounded fun and suggested that she should come over and see it some time.

Then she asked if I was in a fraternity, and I said that since I lived off campus and was taking nineteen hours that I didn't really have time. Just then my friend Fred walked up and invited himself into the conversation. Not good.

She asked him if he was in a fraternity. He (honestly) responded that both of us were pledge brothers in a fraternity at Georgia Tech.

That was the last I saw of her.

Ouch! Damn friends.