In hindsight maybe she was just trying to bait me into committing the crime

My dad led a pretty wild life when he was younger. I was positive that he had probably spent at least one night in jail when he was about my age. I found out that I was wrong and that he had no sympathy for me as I sat on a cold concrete bench in the holding cell.

I don't hold a grudge. I am not a jealous man. For the most part I am really calm. But as Anthony Perkins said in Psycho, "Everyone goes a little mad...sometimes." I went mad one night when my ex-girlfriend and her new boyfriend showed up at my door in the middle of the night.

I came home late one night to my neighbor hosting a loud party at his place. It had been a long day for me and I threw off my clothes and crashed on the couch and went to sleep. Unknown to me, my ex was lurking just on the other side of the wall.

A few hours later I awakened out of a sound sleep. I don't know if it was the sudden silence from next door or something else but I was compelled to look out the peephole of my door and see what was going on in the hall.

As I looked out the peephole I came face to face with her and her skinny Asian boyfriend. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was about two-thirty in the morning and she was standing less than two inches from me writing on my front door with a Sharpie! I was totally taken by surprise and in that moment I flipped out.

Without thinking I opened the door and gave her a shove with both hands that made her fall flat on her ass. In almost the same motion I cocked my arm back for a swing at her boyfriend. That was as far as I got before the two cops that were standing about three feet away tackled me.

As she was writing on my door, two of CWU's finest were citing my neighbor for a noise violation. They weren't expecting a guy in his boxer shorts, t-shirt, and socks to commit an assault only a few feet away—that was just dumb luck, I guess you could say. I guess that was more interesting than the noise complaint because they cuffed me and hauled me off to the Kittitas County Jail straight away.

I didn't want to say in jail any longer than I had to so as soon as I could, I made that call home where I asked Mom, at about 3:00 a.m. "Guess where I am?" I thought for sure that Dad would laugh it away and bail me out with a smile on his face.

Dad had never spent a night in jail and Mom had to beg him to let her bail me out. Those were the longest hours of my life but the bail bondsman finally came and they let me go. I had to walk home in the rain and wind wearing only boxers and a t-shirt.

In the long run it cost me about $5,000 in legal fees and all that I got out of it was a cool set of mug shots.