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Home > Stories > Read Story
Neighbor Nookie
Posted:12/09/2002
Views: 17,161
Grade: D
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This story takes place around the same time as "Two Fine Party Favors" and begins in the same place.
One day, Stan's neighbor (a hot mom in her late 20's) came over and borrowed some hand weights from Stan.
Flash-forward about a week, I'd gone over to Stan, Geoffrey's and Drew's house to knock back a few beers and hang out. After playing some pool, we decided to step outside on their front porch for a smoke break. In all, there were about 10-15 people outside, and the music was playing, so it kinda looked like there was a party going on.
A car drove by and slowed down. A woman (who we quickly recognized as Stan's hot mama neighbor) leaned her head outside the back window of the car and said, "Hey neighbors! Y'all having a party and you didn't invite us?"
Geoffrey immediately replied, "Come on in!"
However, she countered with, "Why don't you join us in here?"
Stan and Geoffrey looked at each other. Then they both jumped up, ran out to the car, leaving me and about eight or so other people sitting on their front porch. And since Drew had left earlier to go over to his girlfriend's house, nobody who actually lived there was around.
About two hours later I finally left; still no signs of Stan or Geoffrey came back.
A week or so after the above event took place (no one had mentioned ANYTHING about it, so I'd actually forgotten about it), I was watching a movie with Stan at his place when there was a knock on the door. Stan said, "Come in." The door opened and his neighbor dropped the weights she'd borrowed from him on the couch, turned around and slammed the door.
I looked at him and said, "What the fuck was that about? Did you..."
"Yeah, and Geoffrey screwed her roommate. Then a couple of days ago, she came over here. She wants a relationship or something. Fuck that, I'm not getting involved in that way with a woman who has three kids."
I never even heard the lady's name, I only know her by "Stan's Bitch." I don't even think that Stan knows her name,
or that he ever did.
One day, Stan's neighbor (a hot mom in her late 20's) came over and borrowed some hand weights from Stan.
Flash-forward about a week, I'd gone over to Stan, Geoffrey's and Drew's house to knock back a few beers and hang out. After playing some pool, we decided to step outside on their front porch for a smoke break. In all, there were about 10-15 people outside, and the music was playing, so it kinda looked like there was a party going on.
A car drove by and slowed down. A woman (who we quickly recognized as Stan's hot mama neighbor) leaned her head outside the back window of the car and said, "Hey neighbors! Y'all having a party and you didn't invite us?"
Geoffrey immediately replied, "Come on in!"
However, she countered with, "Why don't you join us in here?"
Stan and Geoffrey looked at each other. Then they both jumped up, ran out to the car, leaving me and about eight or so other people sitting on their front porch. And since Drew had left earlier to go over to his girlfriend's house, nobody who actually lived there was around.
About two hours later I finally left; still no signs of Stan or Geoffrey came back.
A week or so after the above event took place (no one had mentioned ANYTHING about it, so I'd actually forgotten about it), I was watching a movie with Stan at his place when there was a knock on the door. Stan said, "Come in." The door opened and his neighbor dropped the weights she'd borrowed from him on the couch, turned around and slammed the door.
I looked at him and said, "What the fuck was that about? Did you..."
"Yeah, and Geoffrey screwed her roommate. Then a couple of days ago, she came over here. She wants a relationship or something. Fuck that, I'm not getting involved in that way with a woman who has three kids."
I never even heard the lady's name, I only know her by "Stan's Bitch." I don't even think that Stan knows her name,
or that he ever did.
- Victoria College
Editors Note:
So much for neighborly flirting, and now it's time for mom's gone wild.
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