Not necesarily the most romantic of places, neither of us seemed to mind

As a junior having experienced pretty much all there is to do in Orlando away from all the tourist shit, alcohol and sex were my only saviors. Being a ridiculous drunk my whole college career I decided to extremely overdo it one night.

Before my friend Kris picked me up, I threw down a 12-pack at my house. A couple hours later along with my roommates and three other girls and two guys, we decide to head out to a local club. There, I was happy to find out that it was dollar beer night, perhaps the greatest invention since all-you-can-drink night.

After a decent amount of beer and shots, I decided to join up with the rest of my friends on the dance floor. Now, we have this friend, “Eric,” who is gay and we all know it even though he hasn’t come out yet. Eric was dancing with a girl who wasn’t in our group, So I start messing around with both of them. I get Eric to grab her tits knowing she won’t care cause he’s obviously gay. As my buddies and I are dying laughing, I cut in and she starts grinding all over me. Soon we’re making out and I’m liking how this is going.

I head back to the bar to rejoin my roommates and tear through about four beers in several minutes. After delighting them with my latest escapade I promptly make my way back to my very friendly dance partner.

After dancing for a little while we begin to make out again…pretty heavily this time. As she is going to town on my neck and ears, I hear the announcement for last song. Shit! However, as we’re leaving the club everyone decides to head to a local pizza place – including my new friend!

Waiting in the rather long line, she decides to forget that there are about 100 other people in the restaurant and resume where we left off in the club. My drunken genius manifested itself in my offer to escort her to the bathrooms in the back of the place. Completely ignoring my friends questions as to where I was going, we make our way back there. As we approach the area, I see that the men’s room is out of order and notice the absurdly long bathroom line which I unknowingly cut. I ask the two guys in the front if I could please go into the bathroom ahead of them while pointing to the girl. They tell me that as much as they would like to help they really have to piss and tell me to use the storage area right behind us.

Thanking them for their quick thinking I push aside the curtain and put her up on the stacked boxes. A minute later, she elbows an empty keg shell, which comes crashing down. Crap! This prompts one of the workers to come out and ask, “What the fuck’s going on?” I apologize and explain that I was just looking for the bathroom.

Next, I suggest trying the pizza place on the other side of the club. Going straight into the bathrooms, I lock the door and put her up on the sink. As I start finger banging her, she undoes my pants and starts going to town on my junk. Next thing I know some crazy bitch is banging on the bathroom door and yelling to get the fuck out of the bathroom. Thinking we were done, I pull back and ask what the girl what she wants to do. She says the lady can go fuck herself and starts back on me again.

I’m beginning to like this girl. A few moments later the crazy bitch is back at it. Thinking this just is not meant to be, we walk out and, I must say that this is where my pure brilliance really shines through. I grab her hand and walk out the back door of the restaurant to the back area behind the two pizzas places and the club.

We find a quaint little alley and we resume right where we had left off. A little while later, with her back up against the wall, she looks at me with those amazing eyes and tells me that she wants me to screw her right there in the alley. Of course I agree that that is an excellent idea. I quickly turn her around and start at it.

While we’re still having sex, I notice that the bar backer from the club is going back and forth to the dumpster no more than 50 feet away from us. He makes six or seven trips without noticing us. But on the next trip I was pretty into it and when I see him looking our direction, straining to make out what’s going on. I put my finger up to my mouth trying to gesture him to be quiet and not say anything. He puts his hands up as if to say ok and goes back inside. I turn my concentrations back to the girl and keep pleasing her. A good five minutes go by before I see the bar backer again, but this time he’s standing outside with about fifteen other people all watching us go to town! I quickly assess the situation and decide to put on an amazing show, which went on to include many moans and screams. A couple minutes later she stops and lets me know that she came. Knowing that I’m wasted out of my mind and it would take at least another hour to get me off, I agree to go back inside. As we walk by, our audience starts shouting, “What happened?”

I yell back, “She came!” and they all started cheering and going crazy.