Pirates Of The Caribbean
A yo, ho, ho and a bottle of rum. Ahoy, matey, we've got a pirate film here that's been getting good word of mouth and reviews calling it a "fun time." It's got an easy-on-the-eyes, appealing romantic duo (The Fellowship of the Ring's Orlando Bloom and Bend It Like Beckam's Keira Knightley); Oscar pedigree (Shine's Geoffrey Rush); and a charismatic performance by Johnny Depp. And for pete's sake, it's a pirate movie!
Aarrggh, tis a storm abrew. Will Turner (Bloom) is a commoner hopelessly in love with the governor's daughter Elizabeth (Knightley), who's set to marry another wealthy snob. But before Will can grab thee a wench, the evil Capt. Barbossa (Rush) and his crew sweep into town, pillaging the town and raping the women and children (well, not really). But they do make off with Elizabeth.
Will can't bear to see his love in peril, so he hatches an ambitious rescue plan: He defies royal orders and hatches the mysterious, eccentric Jack Sparrow (Depp) from jail. Sparrow is a rogue pirate who knows the whereabouts of Barbossa's crew, but can Will trust him to help him find Elizabeth? And is there treasure in them thar hills? Gar!
Adding to the intrigue is the fact that Barbossa's crew is a cursed one, existing somewhere between the realm of the living and the dead. In one of the film's best sequences, Elizabeth discovers the truth about Barbossa's crew and finds herself in the midst of a crew of living skeletons. Shiver me timbers!
Plain and simple, I found this movie overlong and predictable. You expect producer Jerry Bruckheimer (Pearl Harbor) to play it safe. But director Gore Verbinski, roundly bashed for The Mexican, delivered real scares in the petrifying sleeper hit The Ring. With a few notable exceptions -- such as a fight scene between the governor's men and an army of skeletons -- Pirates just didn't grab me. But it's tough to be too hard on screenwriters Ted Elliott and Terry Russio when the inspiration for their film is a Disney amusement park ride. Pass the grog, please.
Bloom is a likable hero, and Knightley makes a good feisty heroine. But for many viewers, the real treat is Johnny Depp in an offbeat, unusual performance that is even garnering Oscar buzz. Alas, despite the fact that I'm pretty big Depp fan (see Donnie Brasco, From Hell, etc.), his eccentricity here seemed forced to me, a desperate attempt to inject some much-needed spark in the proceedings. I found myself cringing as often as I laughed at his performance. Argh.
Considering how many other filmgoers thoroughly enjoyed Pirates, I guess this means it's time to prepare the plank. Stowaways (that means me) overboard. Dead men tell no tales.
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Ahoy! Capt. Morgan wishes to make your acquaintance, matey!
A handsome leading man who risks life and limb to save his damsel in distress? Sounds like a date-night winner.
Buy This Double-sided poster At AllPosters.com
Buy This Poster At AllPosters.com
Buy This Poster At AllPosters.com
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